Dear Kate,
I worried as I published my letter that it would induce the knee-jerking defensiveness so common in all human nature. But you are wise to let that instinct ease as you thought through your response.
I agree with you in your image of the coral. Capt and I truly feel our paths, though originally going different directions, have merged. And I do agree with the fact of life where often we make the choice to sacrifice one good thing for another. Decisions are difficult to make, especially when our dreams cannot become reality (your education in Boston to my opening a cafe for example). But we find the next best path. Or an alternative may find us postponing one dream's reality for another. Today, I dream of the day I can leave Pensacola and find a new career path, but today is not the time for Capt's sake, nor mine. Besides, I am still in love with my home town (as you are yours) and am quite content here for a while longer, at least until that next path pulls Stephen and I, walking hand in hand, to our next destination.
I do completely relate to you and your situation, and it excites my mind to hear you describing paths in ways which mirror my life today (your words much more vivid and colorful than my own). I lived through the negative side of my letter, sacrificing what I wanted for the sake of another, loosing the bond of compromise. And I would never wish that upon anyone I loved. It tends to be a blind path: you think you are going the way life intended only to be nose first in a dead end. The only way out is backing up and starting anew...not always a bad thing, but certainly avoidable.
I applaud J for digging your brain to make sure what he wants and what you want are truly on the same page. Sharing dreams is certainly a wonderful feeling! (and just happens to help make dreams more likely to become reality)
Paix, ma cousine sage,
Leigh
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